About 2 months ago Carter asked us to learn how to "swim in the ocean" (aka swim lessons). We heard the pool at Mountlake Terrace has the best lessons around and is only 10 minutes from our house. But, because they are so good it is almost impossible to get signed up. I called 1 hour after open registration began and was put on a waiting list! But, lucky for us, 2 days before lessons started, I received a call that there was 1 open spot waiting for Carter. We were all so excited!
The first swim lesson was a lesson in patience and anticipation. We arrived a little too early but Carter patiently waited until his name was called and happily followed the other kids in the pool.
Because there were so many kids they split them up into 3 mini-classes. Of course, in all of his excitement, he got a little confused who is teacher was. So, he sort of wandered around the pool aimlessly looking for the right spot, while still having a huge smile on his face!
And then everything went down hill. His teacher, Miss Emily, is a wonderful, young teacher with tons of patience for a group of 3 year olds. In the most kindhearted way, she called out to Carter to follow her, but he didn't hear her. So, she just naturally scooped him right up and moved him from one side of the pool to the other. Well, that freaked Carter out. Big time. Like, "I don't know who that person is and she just picked me up and now I'm never, ever, ever, ever getting in the pool again" freak out. Awesome. The problem was I didn't realize what was bugging him so much that first day. He just insisted on sitting by the side of the pool the rest of class and then told me later that day how he was terrified of his teacher because she picked him up without asking him first.
At first I was really annoyed with Carter. Didn't he realize how hard it was to get into these classes and how much money we spent? Didn't he realize the time commitment we had made? Or the excitement I had in my head as I watched my little boy in his first organized sports class?
And then I realized he didn't. And why should he. He's only 3.
Instead he had learned from me that it wasn't okay for strangers to touch you. And he knew it was important to always ask someone if they want to do something before just doing it. He had listened to my teaching and followed through with it with his swim teacher, who was in his mind, a complete stranger.
We went back on week 2 and explained to Miss Emily why he was scared and she promised to not pick him up. But, he didn't buy it. He was the only dry kid at the pool. Wouldn't even put a toe in the water.
We decided to go swimming as a family before week 3. Just to let him have fun and hopefully want to get in the water again. It worked! Carter and Matt had a great time playing, splashing and blowing bubbles under the water. I thought, "yes, he'll be fine for week 3!"
Nope. Week 3 was the worst. Tears, screaming, pleading to go home and a mind made up that swimming was not for him. At least not with that teacher.
So, here we are. Tomorrow is week 4. And we aren't going. It was a hard decision for me because it feels like we are giving up. But I've come to terms that we aren't giving up. Carter gave it his best shot and right now, in his little 3 year old body and mind, it's not for him. And that's okay. Will he still learn to swim eventually? Yes. Will he still enjoy organized sports? Of course. But I think trust is important too. Trusting that we listen to his worries and fears and more importantly validate them. That it's okay to be scared sometimes, but it's important to try. And he did. And that he might not be the next Michael Phelps by the age of 5. I guess I can live with that too.
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