While I'm still in my sleep deprived, running on adrenaline state of mind I thought I'd try to capture my thoughts from the last 30 or so hours. It's been a whirlwind...that's for sure.
To begin though, I really must remember how incredible my pregnancy was. I've said it before: I love being pregnant. I love how my body feels, I adore the baby kicks, squirms and wiggles, I love sharing my experience with others and I am in awe at the miracle of life. This pregnancy was a dream. I felt so good the entire 39 weeks. No nausea or vomiting, a small drop in energy but very tolerable, able to keep working out until 2 days before I delivered and no major pain or discomfort. A phase in my life, that although I am sad to see end, I will look back on in total delight.
Most of you know but the weeks leading up to little Simon's arrival were a little hectic. Or a lot. We had 2 kids playing soccer taking up 3 nights a week. We were both still working with Matt taking on a few major projects at work consuming his days and most nights at home. We bought a fixer upper house and began working to remodel it just 2 weeks ago. And we started packing up our current home. So I kept praying that this baby would wait until the "big" stuff had finished. And prayers were answered. Soccer season ended the morning before his birth, preschool was finished, I stopped seeing clients at work and we got a good chunk of the remodel started all before labor day began!
On the night of the 13th I started to feel a little crampy around 10:30pm. It wasn't the usual Braxton Hicks that had filled my days for weeks before but wasn't too uncomfortable either. Just crampy. So I thought I'd just go to bed and if anything was serious I knew I'd wake up. Matt stayed downstairs to watch a movie and because it wasn't painful I didn't even mention anything to him.
About 2 hours later at 12:30am, with Matt sound asleep on the couch (so much for that movie, huh?), I woke up with a pretty painful contraction. I didn't think too much of it though, went to the bathroom and then had another one. So, I timed a couple. Sure enough, contractions were coming every 2 minutes, lasting about 45 sec - 1 min. long. Whoa. Where did this come from?! Knowing that I needed to page my midwife, call our sitter and text our birth photographer I wanted to be sure this was the real deal before bugging everyone. But, after 10 minutes of timing them I knew in my heart these weren't going to just go away. I quickly got dressed, grabbed the bags and headed downstairs to wake up Matt. Thinking I was just telling him to come to bed he woke up and was shocked when I said, "Honey, I think we need to call the midwife." "Umm. Wow, okay! he replied.
He finished packing up some stuff while I called around 1am. Based on how I was coping she assured me labor wasn't imminent but to plan to come in at 2am. We arranged plans with the sitter and went to wake up the kids. The kids were a little confused why we were putting them in the car in the middle of the night but quickly got excited when they realized they got to have a sleepover with their best friends! We dropped them off about 1:45am with me jumping out of the car to have a contraction against the car instead of in the front seat. I didn't really get a chance to say goodbye but they didn't seem to mind. Middle of the night car rides are a pretty big deal when you are a kid.
There are a few routes to the birth center and seeing it was the middle of the night and my contractions were definitely not fun while riding in a car Matt decided the freeway would be the fastest way to go. He drove over to the 405 onramp only to discover it was closed and we had to be detoured to northbound instead. What?!? Of course this happened while I was having a contraction only making his stress more worrisome for me. Because the freeway was essentially shut down for road work we had to turn around, go back through town and take backroads to the birth center, delaying our drive by at least 10 minutes. On our way we passed a drunk driver, 2 police officers pulling over another drunk driver and a few red lights that I encouraged Matt to just drive right though while he sped down the road. We arrived at the birth center at 2:05am with my midwife (Jen) and birth photographer (Becca) waiting.
I walked in, happy to be out of the car and had 1 contraction in the lobby before walking to my birth suite. The other birth suites had already been used earlier in the night by 2 other new moms so we took the last one available, which ended up being perfect. By now I wasn't coping or breathing as well as before. It had turned more into moans and whines. Jen checked my vitals, which were perfect and listened to the baby during one contraction while the tub filled with water. I opted to have her check my cervix since I hadn't had any previous cervical checks and was curious what I was in for in the coming hours (little did I know!). She checked and I was already at 9+ cm with a bulging bag of waters. I had 1 more contraction on the bed, feeling a ton of pressure before getting into the tub.
By now I really wasn't coping well. The water felt amazing and was so soothing but my brain was crazy. Never once did I even think about wanting or needing drugs. Instead, I just whined to Matt that I didn't want to do this anymore and screamed the F word as loud as I could. I began to feel more pressure and then a relieving pop with the next contraction. My water had broken and more pressure began. I had been squatting in a froggy position in the water but as I felt more of an urge to push Jen had me turn to my back so she could help guide the baby out and I could assist. I continued to scream, squeeze Matt's hands above my head and try to breath as best I could.
With the next contraction I realized screaming was pointless. I was wasting my energy and my brain finally told me now was the time. It was time to meet my baby and I was determined to do this.
I curled my body around my stomach and pushed. It felt so good. I was in my zone and knew this was the moment. The water helped me so much. His head was partially out but I had to wait for another contraction before I could keep going. This moment was probably the hardest of all. I felt burning, stretching and every muscle in my body wanted to just keep going, but I knew that was pointless. I needed to work with my body and allow it the time to bring this baby out. Just a few seconds later I was pushing again and his head was out. Jen announced "wow, this is a big baby!" which made me shudder at the thought of still having to deliver his shoulders. On the final contraction I gave a few small pushes and met my baby.
Just 35 minutes after getting to the birth center, just 2 hours after feeling that first painful contraction at home, I delivered my baby in the water, surrounded by the best birth team ever and cradled my baby on my chest. Matt was in tears, Jen was smiling and I was a huge mix of emotions.
We waited a few minutes while the cord stopped pulsating and just stared in awe at our baby, still wrapped in washcloths in the water. I finally realized we still didn't know the sex. So, I moved the cloth and took a peek. A boy!!! It felt so right and perfect and everything we could have ever hoped for.
Because the cord was still intact and very short Jen helped me get out of the tub while holding Simon in my arms and walk to the bed nearby to rest and deliver the placenta. The quiet music playing in the background, candles lit, lights dimmed and peacefulness of the room was beyond perfect. No rush to start assessments or cut the cord. No monitors beeping. No random staff entering the room. Just me and my birth team...all taking in the moment.
After another few minutes Matt cut the cord and I delivered my placenta. After eating so many kale salads and berries for weeks on end to help keep my platelet count in check the birth assistant said it was one of the healthiest placentas she'd ever seen!
We got to spend the next hour just having a little family time. Becca stayed with us the entire time to capture little moments of joy. There was never any rush to do anything we weren't ready for. The newborn assessment was put off so Matt could spend time with his son. I ate and drank as I pleased and just rested in the comfort of a large bed with Matt laying beside me. The music continued to play. We laughed and tried to all comprehend what had just happened. I thanked God that Matt was at home when labor began and all of our other contingency plans never needed to be used.
Jen finally did a thorough assessment, weight and length measurements before I got dressed and we got ready to go home. For so long Matt worried about leaving the birth center so quickly after delivering. But, in that moment, he even agreed there was no sense in just sitting around and was happy we could head home to the comfort of our own bed.
Finally, at 5:01 am, just 3 hours after arriving, we buckled Simon into his car seat and drove home. It was the most surreal moment. The sun had risen and we were driving home with a newborn in the back seat. I couldn't have asked for a more perfect birth experience. The environment, support, love - everything I desired and had dreamed about for 39 weeks. Absolutely perfect.
Official stats:
Simon Philip Vance (Philip is my 99 year old Grandpa's name)
8lbs, 1 oz
21.5 inches long
Born on 6.14.15, 5 days before his due date.
The kids got to meet him at home and were SO excited. Carter had been hoping, begging and pleading for a little brother and finally got his wish. Lucy was a little bummed it wasn't a girl but seeing a new baby made her squeal with delight.
Our family is complete and my heart couldn't feel more love.
My three greatest little loves.
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